Cleaner Living

Everyday is a brand new beginning right.. I pray so. The empty Oreo cookie package in the waste basket from the night before or the last few nights in a row that it took to polish them off is evidence that I am not trying to hide anything but, as always it is a blaring component of my need to fill something other then my belly from time to time. Sweet? Salty? Boozy? Comforting? Calming? I'm not sure when I came to the understanding that substances other then just myself were a "fix it" for my emotional wellness and how it came to have such an impact on my everyday life from a very young age.

I think we learn what we live, or at least I did, some things took a few rounds to get it, but there it was in the end. There was a lot of thumping and bumping through life, learning as you go kind of lessons, model what you see more so then any philosophies.. and became kind of the gist of my eclectic, self medication tactics. I know I am not alone here..

Garden variety was a term I heard once at a support meeting describing people like me years ago. I had never heard that term before. I liked the garden part. Flowers. Blooming. Propagation. Color... The variety piece was appealing as well. Variety is the spice of life right? Keeps things interesting to have varied interests, maybe not dozens and dozens, but variety could only be beneficial was my way of thinking.

Well, in the best case scenario maybe, but with a cellular predisposition to wander, inattention and a distracted make up with a propensity to obsessive natures and not having any innate understanding of which direction was right or wrong, accepted or desired, a "Garden Variety" personality such as myself ended up being a perfect recipe for a Hot Mess Soup.. and one that I made often.

Most of the lessons I learned in my life have come from personal experiences. Good, bad, embarrassing, fearful, spiritual, dangerous, exciting, creative, hysterical, in a fun way of course. :) They all came when they came and it wasn't until after the fact when I had some perspective and I would say...
Damn.... That was a little sketchy, or Man..... I don't think I'll ever do that again, or Awesome!!!... I want to do that for the rest of my life... I know I'm not alone here either.. Lol..

Anyway, reflecting a bit now in my older years, I don't remember ever choosing to do something that I researched, investigated all of the scenarios, knew all of the facts, accessed the risk factors FIRST..  AND THEN..  made a choice to move forward.  Anything that I ever was passionate about and wanted to discover fully, seemed to choose me and when that happened I was ALL IN!  I was never one to "Seek Wise Counsel"... and then proceed with caution. I was a touch the wood stove kind of girl and figured out pretty quick most times that doing one thing or another was either good or not good in my own personal Book of Wisdom and moved forward or backward from there. Which may explain my abundance of scars, unfinished projects and creative endeavors.

To end.. With all of this nuttiness going on in our world, routines, lives, physical and mental health turned upside down and side ways what was the best way for me to channel some of that and take care of myself?  The other day a very wise, young person shared with me her thoughts and it was to "first, do no harm". As simple as that. Hippocrates in his finest hour. Brilliant!!

So today, I'll take a step out or over the hard stuff however I can manage and cause the least amount of harm to myself or others and then move on from there.
No shame here. No big rules or inner~judgey eye rolls.. Just another 24 hours to make it less harmful, and kinder, for myself and then to anyone close enough to share it with, 6 feet apart of course.

Cheers,

Denice

Learning To Set Goals

 In the last 35 days of my life I have been on a trek to a nutritionally cleaner way of life. After taking out about 95 percent of the gluten in my diet I am amazed at how much better I felt. Being encouraged with the process I decided to begin adding more of the other "free" forms to my lifestyle and see how it all unfolds.

Initially I had set a goal for 30 Days, but it ended up being more like a daily goal or commitment to feeling better. Never perfect, slow and steady, always moving forward was my mantra. What I did find out in my 30 Days of gluten free living was that I was feeling amazing! Lighter, clearer, everything just seemed to work better from the inside out. I also discovered that there were connections to other nutritional pieces that ran in the same circles as gluten, like sugar & alcohol. Those two seemed to organically jump on board with the gluten so I've also been freeing myself of those a little at a time. The alcohol was easier then the sugar, but mostly I think it's all how your body deals with it so I am trying to be patient with myself with each decision.

What is super interesting in all of this is these things that I'm becoming free from have totally contributed negatively more then I ever imagined to my feelings of lethargy. low energy, indistinguishable fog in my brain and to me not truly being my best self.

"What's the sense in living like that?" you might ask. Free of all of those things doesn't make for much fun.. or does it? Well, that's what I'm being open to and learning about. To me it doesn't feel like I'm sacrificing or depriving myself overly much.. When I weighed the pros and cons of what I was experiencing in those first 30 Days it seemed crystal clear that the pros were winning. None of these choices inhibit me from anything important to me that is life giving or deprive me of enjoying the things in my life that I truly love to do. Some would argue, but those some, are not me.
Alas! No argument. :)

So here were the CONS:  Constant indigestion whenever I ate or drank gluten. Sugar spikes with crazy energy and crashes that always led to sugar comas. Terrible sleep patterns. Cravings that sent me into a tirade of seeking whatever it might be that I was needing to stuff into my zero hunger face! Irregularity, stomach aches, hangovers from booze and food. Swollen body, fingers and toes, and a big ole belly just hanging around not doing much of anything. Awesome... That's how I want to feel on a daily basis.. (oozing sarcasm).

Now the PROS: These pros are linked to what I am doing now, which is GF(gluten free) & AF(alcohol free).. The sugar is pretty intermittent so I didn't want to speak to soon about that. So, positives about GF & AF for me are, no intergestion at all. Zero!! No antacids needed, no stomach aches. I have tons of energy! Mental energy more then physical I'd even say. I'm reading more, wake up earlier and feel better, don't need as much sleep and just feel more whole and like myself. I have saved over $200.00 by not having a couple of drinks every night and in just a years time that's a few pretty sweet trips to do something life giving and fun! A definite PRO there. Lastly, my belly has shrunk! I've lost 5 lbs and I think it's straight from my stomach. I haven't done anything except those two things, a total bonus.

This is all in just 35 Days.. Pretty psyched. There has been one issue though the last 5 days. I had hit my 30 and then kind of felt all over the place. Was not watching my intake of gluten very much, snacked on way too many sweets and wasn't really being mindful. A friend mentioned to me that I needed another goal. That it was the goal that motivated me and that I should think of what that next one would be. Smart friend :) It made all of the difference. I wanted to continue my focus with the AF & GF still, so...

My new goal is walking! Daily mindful walks. I have 25 more days to get to my collective total of 60. I feel like the walking will support all the other wellness pieces and allow them more time to sink in. This new goal has shifted my thinking and given me a new sense of purpose, I'm anxious to get underway. In the last few years I've had to embrace my monkey mind nature and find that if I keep things interesting in one way or another it all seems to work out pretty well. So walking it is! Besides, if I move more maybe the sugar might not have to all go away. :)



Share your goals in the comments below! It makes all the difference.

Be Well!

Denice